Inspired by our workshop with Dr. Abby Medcalf
This past Saturday, our Girls Who CEO cohort spent time with psychologist and boundaries expert Dr. Abby Medcalf, and one thing became clear very quickly:
Boundaries are not about pushing people away.
They are about knowing yourself well enough to stand in your own space.
Many girls grow up learning to be agreeable, accommodating, and “nice.” While kindness matters, leadership requires something more powerful: clarity about what is and isn’t okay for you.
Abby reminded us that boundaries are simply the line where you end and someone else begins.
If you don’t set your boundaries, someone else will.
During the workshop, the girls practiced responding to everyday situations that can feel uncomfortable or confusing:
- A friend pushing you to do something you don’t want to do
- Someone repeatedly interrupting you
- A teammate taking credit for your work
- A person who doesn’t respect your time
Instead of reacting with anger or staying silent, they practiced clear, calm responses.
Examples like:
- “Yes” and “I’m not comfortable with that.”
- “That doesn’t work for me.” and “I do not want to be your science partner in class.”
- “Please don’t speak to me that way.”
- “Yes. Thank you for asking me and I need some time to think about that.”
One of the biggest misconceptions about boundaries is that they are selfish. In reality, they are the opposite.
At Girls Who CEO, we talk a lot about confidence and leadership and we know that leadership doesn’t start with speaking on a stage or running a company.
It starts with something simpler and more powerful:
Knowing your worth and protecting your energy and knowing how to BE, before we learn how to DO.
Girls who learn boundaries early grow into women who can:
- negotiate salaries
- lead teams
- make hard decisions
- stand up for themselves and others
- They learn that their voice matters.